Monday, September 10, 2007

This just in: Pope is Catholic!

Petraeus says we are winning in Iraq!

Yes, we are winning. Just very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very slowly.

So if a general in the army says we are winning, it must be true.

Know how I know? Because I am an American, and 68% of us believe that only the military can resolve the war in Iraq.


See?

Only the military can resolve the war. Now if only we can figure out who is in charge of the military.

I hope it's not that 5% guy.

But if it is, at least he's better than no one. By 2%.

7 comments:

dad said...

I listen to Joe Biden Sunday on George Stepanapoules' show. He is right on and I may vote for him.

Kennedy was on Face the Nation and he was right on.

With a central government, there will be no conciliation between the 3 tribes (my word). With no conciliation, American troops will be held hostage to the violence taking place.

Does anyone believe that conciliation is possible? These people have been fighting each other of hundreds of years. I am betting, not in my life thinking I have another 20+ years to go.

Frank Sirmarco said...

Fucking brilliant!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Only the aliens who anally probe Bush can help us win the war.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Dad: Do not fall for the Biden thing. Oh, sure, he sounds all sane and experience-y, but then, one day, he opens his mouth and a torrent of horrendous nonsense comes out. Beware.

Frank: Thank you. The capacity for logical thinking in this country is mighty impressive, ain't it?

Dr.MVM: I don't remember seeing the names on the roll call of the Coalition of the Willing.

Grant Miller said...

Successfully is the key word there. In that case, I'm a 3 percenter.

kirby said...

Successfully? Yeah, that ship sailed long ago.

Simon Glickman and Sera Gamble said...

And y'know, I don't think Generals deserve any respect whatsoever. They're not "the troops." They're politicians who happen to wear uniforms - because you don't make it to the top of the hierarchy unless you're compromised up the wazoo. Generals are, in fact, painted whores who offer their dead-eyed favors to Presidents and Congresscritters. The idea that anyone would believe one word out of their mouths is shocking to me.