Thursday, November 01, 2007

I've seen it rainin' fire in the sky


Don’t let all those Gore-tex®-encrusted tree-hugging liberals fool you with their “look over there, is that patchouli incense?” skills of misdirection: Colorado is a red state. In fact, it’s a red state with an obnoxious Republican ruling class, which is the most exciting kind of red state to, you know, sort of live in. If you can call that living.

Yes, just like Indiana has, or at least had, the Quayles, Colorado has the Coors, supporters of the ultra-evil Heritage Foundation and the American Enterprise Institute.

Hm. Maybe their money would've been better spent on the Rockies payroll.

Hey, I'm just sayin.

Anyhoos, I don’t like their beer, and I don’t like them. But since I believe that they run in slightly different social circles than my sister, they shouldn’t be too difficult to avoid during my visit to her new digs in Boulder.

What I won't be able to avoid in Boulder: Crocs. I believe they were "invented" there.

I’m not sure what she’s got in store for me, other than shopping, shopping, a lot of kitteh scratches on my hands and feet, and shopping.

Actually, in spite of their addiction to comfortable footwear, Boulder/Denver is a pretty fun place to hang. Plus, they have the best Japanese restaurant ever. That's a hint, sis.

Oh, yes. We will also be making a foray into Nebraska, a state so red even the Democrats are Republicans, to visit the Moms. More shopping. Feats of Strength. The Airing of Grievances. At least one trip to Red Lobster.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.



See you next week.

12 comments:

Joe said...

Enjoy the trip!

Anonymous said...

Let's go pee in Coors' water supply!

Anonymous said...

Pee? Feel free to leave a Cleveland Steamer. I don't drink their beer.

SkylersDad said...

It is so lame it can't even be called beer. It is for people who don't like to get a buzz, just piss a lot.

Hope to see you when you are here Vikki!

GETkristiLOVE said...

Finally, I'll have someone on my side to ridicule all the croc-wearing people of Boulder, not to mention moral support for another trip to the middle of nowhere, Nebraska.

Skydad: Apex Ice Rink at 10pm on Saturday - or Old Chicago for beers afterwards!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Ah, the ever so lovely airing of grievences. Thats the only thing we ever do when my family gets together, well, that and drink like fish.

Distributorcap said...

have fun.........and Coors does suck -- despite there ads saying they use "spring water"

and Boulder is pretty blue

Joe said...

What the hell is with all the Cleveland Steamer references this week?

Moderator said...

I could swear Crocs were invented by my neighbors since that's all they seem to wear.

bubbles said...

Have a great trip, but I'm sorry about Nebraska. I've spent a little time there meself.

dguzman said...

Sorry you're having to go to Hell just to visit your family. One tip: during "airing of the grievances" time, I always watch TV and pretend I'm somewhere else. It seems to keep me sane.

kiki said...

my oh my, you will enjoy this.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=fashion

promise