Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Fuck Rehnquist

Gilligan is dead.


I remember for years hearing the stories that the tv show Gilligan's Island is based on the idea of the seven deadly sins. And when the show's creator, Sherwood Schwartz, came to Chicago to see a stage version of the show, he was asked by a member of the audience in an Q&A session if that rumor was true. "Sure it's true," he said. But who knows? It seems unlikely that the seven stranded castaways were high concept, but you know, stranger things have happened in the television biz.

Let's put this to rest, shall we?

Gilligan = Gluttony (Remember the show where he ate too many bananas? Or the one where he ate too many pies? Or the one where he ate too many coconuts?)

Skipper = Wrath (Weapon of choice? His hat.)

T. Howell 3 = Greed (Who else packs several suitcases full of money for 3 hour cruise?)

Lovey = Sloth (What did she ever do but lay in that damn lounge chair with the parasol and the fruity drink?)

Ginger = Lust (Okay, she was lusted AFTER, mostly, but I saw what she was wearing, and she was asking for it.)

Mary Ann = Envy (Mary Ann is a character Schwartz would later perfect in Jan Brady, whose nemesis, Marcia, is always more desirable than her.)

The Professor = Pride (Always so confident that the coconut radio would alert the authorities to their whereabouts.)

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