Thursday, October 25, 2007

Glen Beck is like, totally a hater. So not cool.


I’m sure most of you have heard by now about conservative asshat Glenn Beck’s comment that the homes of America-haters were burning in the California wildfires:

When I say on the air, and I've said it a lot lately, that we need to come together and we need to get back into the center, we're being pushed on to the edges -- I want you to understand, that is not on policies. I don't mean that we come in the center on policies. We come to the center on principles. We come back to the center of the melting pot, that we're all one America, that just because I disagree with you doesn't mean you hate America, and I love America. We all love America. We just disagree on how we should function, what we should do, big government, small government. It doesn't mean you hate America. I think there is a handful of people who hate America. Unfortunately for them, a lot of them are losing their homes in a forest fire today.

Yes, how unfortunate for them, indeed.

Leaving aside the fact that even at the time of his remarks on Monday, a good deal of those affected by the fires were the citizens of Orange and San Diego counties, which are overwhelmingly Republican. Let’s just assume that he was talking about the people in Malibu.

The America-haters in Malibu.

He has now responded angrily on his show, railing of course against liberal bloggers and such, who he figures intimated that he wanted some people’s houses to burn down. He says we all need to get a sense of humor, because he was joking, and he would never want anyone’s house to burn down.

Not surprisingly, Beck has missed the point entirely.

Beck’s producer has countered that his remarks were not “uncivil,” because “unfortunately’ still means ‘unfortunately.”

Of course one could quibble this point, because Beck did not simply say “unfortunately,” he said “unfortunately for them.”

But I’ll concede that point as not really worth arguing, because Beck’s hostility to the people of Malibu is made apparent by the statement he did not bother to refute or explain, which is, that they hate America.

Beck says at first that we all love America, but then immediately contradicts himself by saying that there are indeed a “handful” of people that do hate America. And apparently they live in Malibu, California.

Rick Sanchez of CNN, on location to cover the wildfires in SoCal, made some equally interesting remarks, as HuffPost’s Mona Gable points out:

Sanchez appeared to be dumbfounded by the idea that Californians, whom he breathlessly described as most familiar to Americans as "laidback, Chardonnay-drinking, quiche-eating" hedonists, were helping each other through perhaps the state's worst natural disaster.

First of, Rick, Californians would not be caught dead eating quiche. Hello, ever hear of carbs? Secondly, anyone who would describe Californians as laidback has never driven on the 405.

Thirdly, fuck you. You think that because we say “like” a whole lot that we don’t care about our neighbors? You think because we regularly declare the weather to be “awesome,” that we don’t recognize a person in need?

Fuck you again. Fuck you, you fucking asshole. Fuck you.

Now, I’m not a big fan, collectively, of the residents of Malibu. They can be some selfish fucks. They have tried many times, for instance, to block the hoi-polloi from accessing the public beaches and hiking trails that they would prefer to make private. Also, their restaurants are overpriced. The sales help in their stores are frequently snotty. Their hyper-aggressive driving habits have made their little stretch of Highway 1 one of the most dangerous automotive clusterfucks in the state of California.

And that’s saying something.

But you know what they’re not? They are not, generally, politically apathetic. They care about 2 things, basically: money, and their causes. And those that support liberal or Democratic politicians do so because they believe in them, and not – and here’s the important part – because it benefits them monetarily.

I mean, sure, they’re obscenely rich, and sure, they spend way too much on handbags and golf clubs, but they also, overwhelmingly, vote for people who favor the government taking more money away from them, and giving it to people who don’t have as much as they do.

Therefore, if you wanted to call them selfish, the worst aspersion you could cast upon their politics is that they believe that a rising tide lifts all boats.

That’s a bit different than the obscenely rich people who vote Republican, isn’t it?

So how is it, exactly, that they are hedonists? How is it, exactly, that they hate America? By trying to do the things they believe will make it better, against their own economic interest?

Lord knows it pains me to defend the residents of Malibu, with their complicated coffee drinks and their pretentious dogs and their painfully full lips, but in a comparison between Glenn Beck and them as to who loves America the most, Beck is not fit to kiss their excruciatingly well-pedicured feet.

11 comments:

Larry Jones said...

Well said. For more enjoyment, check out Jason Linkins' an excellent smackdown of Beck in today's HuffPo.

Distributorcap said...

what more can i say
excellent post
beck is human garbage as is CNN for allowing him to remain on air

but Imus --- had to go ....

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I'm nominating you for the Nobel Prize for defending those asswipes in Malibu. You must be worthy of it since you so eloquently rose to the defense of people you dislike.

vikkitikkitavi said...

LJ: It's a good piece, but I'm not sure Beck is worth the energy. To keep that close tabs on him is like the old saying about wrestling a pig: You both get covered in shit, but only the pig likes it.

DCap: I used to like CNN. I think now they are trying to take audience share from FoxNews.

anonymous: You know, it does not bother me at all when anonymous fuckfaces come into my comments section and call me a cunt. It's to be expected in this country that when you express opinions that are open-minded and critical of hypocrisy over the internets, that you will attract the occasional anonymous comment troll. Not that I have anything against anonymous comment trolls as such, although when the best they can come up with is "fuck you cunt," then I have to shake my head and wonder why you even bother.

Here's an idea: kill yourself. No seriously. I'm pretty sure you must have at least one or two guns, or maybe some oxycontin, lying around. Why not do yourself and everyone on the internets, and everyone around you a huge favor, and just bite it? Take a good look around you dude, is there anyone who would really care if you were wiped from the face of the earth? I’m sure that Walmart could find someone else to work in the stockroom pretty quickly. And your drinking buddies, do they even really give a shit about you when you’re not buying? Would all those right-wing websites really miss your hits? I know for sure that the porn industry is going to survive just fine in your absence, even if hotasianchicks.com would see a short-term decrease in revenue.

So you know, anonymous, if you’re still out there, which seems improbable given the quality of the work you leave behind, but if you are, I invite you to say something intelligent to refute my point of view. If you’re not capable of that, it’s no shame on you, but I think you really out to give oblivion some consideration. Because when it comes to the kind of life an ignorant, hypocritical, waste of human flesh such as yourself must be leading, versus eternal oblivion, I really think you should give oblivion another look.

DrMVM: Thank you, and if I win, I hereby pledge to use my prize money to set up a suicide hotline for anonymous internet trolls. You see, my hotline will be unique, because it will actually encourage suicide.

Some Guy said...

Vikki- I think you are missing the anonymous commenter's point. I think that if you read between the lines you'll see that he understands your frustration with people like Mr. Beck and right-wing ideologues in general. He thinks that if both sides would just listen to each other and try to understand where the other is coming from, we could really see some substantial reconciliation that may lead to bridging the vast divide between right and left.

I'm surprised you didn't get that from his or her comment.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Chris: You should work for the White House.

Moderator said...

I wish they would pull Glen Beck just because he's really dull and difficult to look at.

SkylersDad said...

Sorry Vikki, you are all wrong on Anonymous boy. He likes Hentai, not hotasianchicks.com

Reality bothers him and gives him a headache.

Anonymous said...

I've always wanted to live in Malibu.

GETkristiLOVE said...

Anonymous - I would remark about your point but oh, yeah that's right, you don't have one. You've gone for name calling instead. Are you going to make it into 4th grade this year, or are they holding you back again?

dguzman said...

Right on, Vikki--intelligent post.