Freud called. He wants his prom theme back.

The Father-Daughter Purity Ball? Are you fucking kidding me?

Via Broadsheet:

One of the most memorable highlights of the ball is when the fathers stand in the middle of the ballroom and form a circle around their daughters standing all aglow in their lovely ball gowns. The fathers place their hands on their daughters, and together we pray for purity of mind, body, and soul for generations to come.

I hear that the "varification of the intact hymen" ritual is very moving as well.

Seriously, that description sounds like a bad dream I had once. Only in my dream my dad gave me a cigar, and then we rode a train through a tunnel. And then my mom drowned me in her swimming pool.