Thursday, June 22, 2006

Things I love about Boston #5

Yes, Wrigley Field is beautiful. The Friendly Confines is my first love. And I loved Comiskey, too, before they tore it down and built the world's largest holiday cookie tin that is New Comiskey - ah, sorry, I meant US Cellular Field, ya fucking sellout no-dick dicks.
But from its dim brick underbelly to its manual outfield scoreboard, it's hard to beat Fenway. On my way in through the turnstile, I heard this guy behind me say to his buddy "Those turnstiles are wicked tight. Good thing I don't have a lahge penis."
And look at this random picture of fans entering Yawkey Way:
It's like they won't be let into the park without their game gear. These are fuckin' FANS, baby.
Sure, sometimes their devotion manifests itself in embarassing ways, like...oh...
...this Red Sox visor and Red Sox scrunchie-festooned couple, for example.
Although those items can at least be thrown away and regretted in the coming years. Okay, it's unlikely they will be, but it's at least a possibility. The guy with the Red Sox logo tattoo sitting next to us is gonna have a more difficult time of it.
But hey, when the night is warm and the beer is cold, and the Sox are pounding that Green Monster like another double's all they'll ever need in this cruel cruel world, ya can't nitpick shit like that. You can only sit back and enjoy, and realize that there's no better place on earth than where you are, right now.

(And yes, the pic was taken at our seats, bitches. Jealous?)


michael said...

I've also found that when I make Adam Sandler references while teaching in MA or NY, I'm in. These guys even know Canteen Boy cold.

Porter said...

My buddy Mike and I are trying to see all of the Major League parks. We just got back from a Yankees-Phillies-Nationals trip.

Fenway is No. 2 on my list, right after Wrigley. Both places have a lot of soul and great surroundings, but I have to give the top spot to Wrigley because there's no big screen TV. Without the giant idiot box there, people pay more attention to the game. I love that.

By the way, Yankee stadium has as much charm as a minimum security prison.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Michael: What about Punch Drunk Love? Not so much?

Porter: For sure Wrigley has more women's restrooms, so that gives it an edge for me as well. Haven't been to Yankees suck Stadium, but my worst was the old 3 Rivers in Pittsburgh. What a concrete hellhole. It was uncovered, but with astroturf. And they didn't even bother to match one piece to the next. The field looked like a freakin' quilt.

MonstrousJoe said...

Yawwwwwnnnnnnn... hmm, wha?

GETkristiLOVE said...

The best is when dad took me to the rooftop condos facing Wrigley - those folks had it all together with bleachers, kegs, grills, and no-line at the restroom!

michael said...

V-T-T: Har. Nice. Yeah, not so much.

rock said...

I have to go with Fenway, since I grew up here, but Wrigley is pretty friggin' great.

I finally went there last year for the first time, and it was nostalgic to piss in a trough again. Even Fenway got rid of those a few years ago.

My other visited ballparks:
US Cellular: on the same Chicago trip. They couldn't be more different. It sucks. It has the atmosphere of an NBA game: lots of loud rap and classic rock and sound effects. Ugh.

PNC Park, Pittsburgh: Really nice, spankin' new stadium with an amazing view of the city. Sure, it's big, but in a way that works with the area.

Camden Yards: Nearly lives up to the hype. Also has the best non-hot dog food item I've had in a ballpark: Former Oriole catcher's Boog Powell's Barbecue. A "pit-beef" sandwich. Which is a barbecued roast beef sandwich. Delish.

SkyDome: Maybe this place felt better when it was packed the first few years it was open when the Blue Jays won the Series, but now it's just an empty, cavernous dump. The Red Sox fans made up about half the crowd of the 1/3 full stadium. It was just sad. I liked Toronto, though.

Yankee Stadium: I went when I was like 12, so I don't remember much. I'd like to check it out before they tear it down though. Shea, also.

er, that's it, except for a couple of minor league parks, which are all great fun too.

This may be the longest comment in a blog post ever.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Ah, not to bore Monstrous Joe, who could take his fuckin' nap somewhere else I might add, but I love me some minor league parks.

There are a couple of sweet single A parks not too far from LA. Great place to spend an afternoon if you don't mind the drive.

Grant Miller said...

Wicked sweet-ass seats. I am jealous. And Sox Park is every bit as good as Wrigley - better considering it's not packed with drunk yuppies.

Guess I'll be returning the Red Sox scrunchie I bought for your birthday. Thanks.

Jess said...

Dodger Stadium is pretty sweet, although, the "Dodger Dog" was the absolute WORST hot dog I've ever had. I had to spit it out!

vikkitikkitavi said...

Grant: Present company excluded, of course.

Jess: Dodger Stadium is not bad, although they lose big points for not providing subway or train access to the stadium. WTF?

I gotta say, though, the worst part about Dodger Stadium is that the freakin' Dodgers play there.

I cannot get behind the Dodgers. I've lived here 12 years and I just can't do it.