Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Shooting fish in a barrel

Blackwell's worst-dressed women of 2005 are:

1) Britney Spears - Blackwell calls her "an over-the-hill Lolita." I call her "does anyone care about this bitch anymore?"
2) Mary-Kate Olsen - I totally disagree about this one. I think Mary-Kate is a fashion icon. I mean, she took the whole Annie Hall thing of the 70s, and so totally updated it by being much shorter than Diane Keaton.
3) Jessica Simpson - Blackwell says she's a "cut-rate Rapunzel slingin' hash in a Vegas diner." I say she's about 1 bad marriage away from "Dancing with the Stars."
4) Eva Longoria - Ooooh, I wouldn't want to be on the set with her today.
5) Mariah Carey - Mr. Blackwell wishes she would leave more to the imagination. There's an obvious joke there, except I think the majority of straight men would agree. She starting to resemble a blow-up doll with a microphone.
6) Paris Hilton - Paris just needs to hire better dressers. Clearly the bad outfits are not her idea, since I really don't think she has ideas.
7) Anna Nicole Smith - Oh, leave Anna alone. The bitch is clearly crazy.
8) Shakira - Sha-who? Really, she's that famous, that she gets on this list? I mean, my dog groomer has bad hair too, but she's not on this fucking list, dude.
9) Lindsay Lohan - Should have been #1. Not only does she look awful, and I mean always, but she was so cute and young and normal, like, a year ago.
10) Renee Zellweger - Man, if you can't look pretty on your wedding day, you can't look pretty:


4 comments:

Spooney said...

Jesus,

In that pic Renee looks like the ugly chick in John Water's Cry Baby.
What happende? She used to be kinda cute at one time too.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Renee? It's like the skinnier she gets, the more her face puffs up in retaliation.

RandyLuvsPaiste said...

Give her a break.
Let's see how good YOU look after marrying a bald, gay cowboy.

menzies said...

Britney might have once been a style icon, but she certainly ins't anymore. She's going to remain on not hot lists for a while yet! She's let herself go way too much, and that stands for even before she was pregnent.