Monday, August 21, 2006

New, easier mission: bring ____to Iraq

Thanks again to Harry Shearer, who uncovered the following NYTimes buried lead (2nd to last paragraph of 22) in his August 20th show:
Senior administration officials have acknowledged to me that they are considering alternatives other than democracy,” said one military affairs expert who received an Iraq briefing at the White House last month and agreed to speak only on condition of anonymity.

Holy fucking shit New York Times!!!!

When the top dogs at BushCo abandon their (albeit most recent) justification for a 3 1/2 year-long debacle of a war, i.e., the mission of bringing democracy to Iraq, don't you think the New York Times might consider this NEWS?

Or do the deaths of 2600 servicemen & women, and uncounted thousands of Iraqis, mean nothing?

Well, I, for one, cannot wait to hear what the new, attainable mission in Iraq will be.

What will we bring, if not democracy?

Well, we could bring Starbucks to Iraq. I bet we could do that. We might have to bring the four bucks per drink to Iraq as well, though.

We could bring ESPN to Iraq. I hear they cover soccer now.

One thing we should definitely not do, is bring the electoral college to Iraq. That didn't work out too well for us.

5 comments:

Megan said...

Maybe a nice theocracy?

When I taught government my kids never understood the electoral college. I mean, they got what it was and how it worked and all, they just couldn't figure out why the fuck we still had it. And I sure as hell wasn't about to argue with them. I just told them, "Because the founding fathers thought you were stupid."

Grant Miller said...

Why not bring in a secular, military dictator who despite his saber-rattling, is mostly harmless and actually stabalizes an otherwise unstable area.

Oh wait.

MonstrousJoe said...

How about cocaine and hooters?

Chris said...

Silly Vikki, of course this is not news. Didn't you hear that some guy who may or may not have killed a pretty little white girl ten years ago was on a plane yesterday drinking Champagne? THAT is fucking news! Iraq? Yawn...

vikkitikkitavi said...

Megan: And we'll never get rid of it, because the effort would be too large and there will always be one side that thinks they can use it to their advantage in the next election.

Grant: He's starting to look pretty good, isn't he?

MJoe: Do you mean hooters, or Hooters? I'm down either way.

Chris: So even child molesters can fly first class, but I can never get a fucking upgrade. Can we get some intrepid consumer reporter to blow the whistle on this?